All the Endurance Training Emotions in 48 Hours
I was pretty discouraged after Monday’s ride. It was slower and harder than I wanted it to be. I know I made mistakes – and I’m fixing them – but it was one of those rides where you start wondering if you’re ready for the 70.3 in two weeks and, more ominously, whether you’ll ever be ready for the A-race in 15+ weeks.
Then yesterday happened.
I got my 9-mile run done. It wasn’t fast, and it definitely felt hard, but my legs were dead going in, so that was expected. Honestly, finishing that run actually encouraged me. Running 9 miles on trashed legs is probably a good sign. Add in the fact that I’m actively fixing the bike issues from Monday, and the discouragement started to fade.
I think this is just part of endurance training. Maybe all endurance training. There’s always a point where you question everything – even when training is objectively going well.
You hit your 20-miler while marathon training and immediately think:
“Great… now I just have to run ANOTHER 6.2 miles.”
So I did what everyone does: I went online looking for reassurance. Thankfully, the internet delivered. Yes, most people feel this way. No, I am not racing tomorrow. Yes, there are still months of training left. Relax. Trust the process.
Unfortunately, last night I made another mistake.
I made a fantastic homemade pizza and topped it with salami. Now, at my age, I know better than to eat spicy/salty food near bedtime. And yet…
I washed it down with not one, not two, but THREE Olipops. High fiber. Excellent decision-making.
From about 2:00 a.m. until 5:30 a.m., my subconscious decided to put on a festival of insecurities.
In one dream, it was like some Mad Men-era dinner scene where my wife and her ex-fiancé were discussing getting back together… while I sat there. She agreed and left me. Cool, cool, cool.
Then another dream had me in a bizarre job interview in a hotel room. One guy was sitting on the bed, two were in chairs, and my mother was there for some reason. I sat on the bed during the interview and afterward became convinced I bombed it because I should’ve chosen a chair. Meanwhile, my mother silently disapproved of everything.
So apparently, the Spicy Pizza-Olipop Dream Trilogy covered:
- abandonment
- inadequacy
- maternal judgment
Good stuff.
When I finally crawled out of bed this morning (after stopping myself from clutching my wife like a life raft), I noticed something surprising: my legs felt… good. Not “auditioning for Riverdance” good, but legitimately recovered. Like I could actually go run again if needed.
I foam rolled last night and again this morning before work, and I’m honestly thrilled with how well I bounced back from the long bike and run combo. That recovery gives me confidence.
Today is just a swim, and then easing back into the rest of the week reasonably recovered.
Nutrition: The Missing Piece
I also realized something important: my training nutrition this cycle has been very different from previous Ironman builds.
My diet is actually better overall, but my training nutrition has been terrible. I haven’t really been using gels, carb drinks, or recovery drinks consistently.
That obviously hurt me on Monday’s bike ride, but looking back, I also did basically nothing before, during, or after yesterday’s 9-miler. No gel beforehand. No recovery drink afterward. Nothing.
That’s dumb.
So I’m fixing it:
- gels ordered
- carb drink coming for the bike
- recovery powder on the way
I also took my bike to the local bike shop yesterday for:
- major tune-up
- new tires (slightly wider too)
- fresh grip tape
I’m adding a second bottle cage too. And yes, I’ll actually bring the bottles next time.
I’m also really liking my newer shoes: Hoka Mach X 3.
Most importantly, I’ve reframed the June 14 70.3. It’s a supported training day. That’s it. I don’t care about PRs. I don’t care about the finish time. I’m just practicing putting three sports together over a long day.
That mental shift feels healthy.
All good. Onward.
Relentless forward motion.