I Don’t HAVE to Bang My Head Against the Wall….
There’s a special kind of luxury in taking a day off when you actually need it instead of waiting until your body files a formal complaint.
Yesterday was a mental health date, and honestly, I highly recommend dating yourself. I slept like an angel the night before – one of those rare sleeps where you don’t wake up at 3:17 a.m. wondering if you remembered to reply to an email from three weeks ago. I still got up early, because apparently my body now believes 5:30 a.m. is a personality trait, but there was no rush.
Coffee. Quiet. No work bag. No bell schedule.
I did the full Ross Retirement Simulation.
Went for a run. Went for a swim. Read for a while. Watched a genuinely good movie without scrolling my phone every eight minutes. Read some more. Played drums. Made dinner. Watched hockey. It was 100% enjoyment with no productivity guilt attached. Frankly, I was thriving. If I had put on linen pants and started talking about olive oil, I could’ve become one of those people who moves to Italy.
Meanwhile, in my actual life, I had left what I thought was a pretty fun assignment for my law class.
Find two songs that sound alike – sampling, parody, copyright disputes, whatever. We’re doing copyright law, so I figured this was a layup. Listen to music. Your music. Pick songs. We’ll talk about ownership and infringement.
There are 21 kids in the class.
Two did it.
Two.
I literally assigned teenagers to listen to music and somehow that was too much. Not a ten-page paper. Not Bluebook citations. Not “brief Marbury v. Madison.” I asked them to Google songs that sound alike.
They didn’t even care enough to fake it.
That’s the part that gets me. It’s not just that they didn’t do it – it’s the complete indifference. No panic. No excuse. No “I forgot.” Just vibes. It could have been five minutes of work while sitting in the parking lot before school.
Nothing.
And this is where people love to gaslight teachers.
“Well, if they were more engaged…”
“If the lesson was more relevant…”
“If you built stronger relationships…”
Nope.
Respectfully, nope.
I am the same teacher I’ve been my entire career. Same sarcasm. Same energy. Same stupid jokes. Same projects that used to work. Same assignments kids used to actually enjoy. I’ve done mock trials, debates, music law, crime scenes, contract negotiations – real things, fun things, things designed specifically so they don’t feel like school.
This group of seniors just does not care.
Not all of them, obviously. Two of them did the assignment. God bless those two. I may frame their work like it’s the Constitution.
But when the baseline becomes “I don’t care if I fail,” there is no educational strategy powerful enough to compete with that. You can’t out-teach apathy. You can differentiate, scaffold, build relationships, call home, create incentives, stand on your head juggling flaming copies of the Constitution – but if they fundamentally do not care whether they pass or fail, eventually you’re just performing CPR on a mannequin.
So today, after sleeping terribly because apparently peace has an expiration date, I’m back at work. Making playlists for copyright law. Prepping study guides for other classes. Doing the job because that’s what you do.
But if I’m honest, the tank is running low.
People say focus on the ones who care.
I do.
I absolutely do.
But when it’s 2 out of 21, sometimes that math gets a little depressing.